The bilateral stimulation from the rhythmic movement she engaged in while listening to the music regulated her central nervous system, brought her back into the window of tolerance, and the function of language came back (we did also have a strong relationship at this point which contributed to her feeling safe with me). We were literally just talking about him in our last session, remember?” She managed to say through her tears. She was still grief-stricken, but something was different. Now, after about 10 minutes of listening to music, I could see the difference in her face. Before the music her ability to talk and cognitive function were fragmented. Slowly she started moving her head with the rhythm and the beat of the music. We listened to two or three of her favorite songs. How about we just listen to some music for a while,” I offered. “Don’t worry about talking right now,” I said. She was shifting out of the window of tolerance, meaning it would be difficult for her to be receptive to any intervention that relied heavily on talking, being instructed, or learning anything new. It was clear that because her extensive trauma was getting triggered (on top of this being another traumatic event) that conventional talk therapy or mindfulness meditation wasn’t going to work, despite her being a champion of both therapy and mindfulness. And then we got the tragic news that he passed away via overdose.Īs we met in session the day her father passed away my main prerogative was to stay as present and attuned as possible. We were even at the stage of starting to think about people we could call to get in touch with him. She and I had been working with each other for a while when she started talking about wanting to reconcile with her estranged father. Jeanette in fact had been through a slew of traumatic experiences she grew up in an impoverished neighborhood, witnessed countless acts of violence, was abused herself, and most of her family members, including her father, were addicted to drugs. The outer most part of her brain was shutting down as her mind/body was shifting into a traumatic response that made it difficult for her to use the function of language.

She couldn’t speak because her brain was down regulating.

“I mean I don’t know, I just, I don’t, I can’t…” and she stopped again.

Jeanette*, a 17 year-old high school student, found herself in my office trying to describe the shock of losing her father:

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